phone notes

LXZIPIZo (1)

I have a bunch of random half-thoughts in my notes app. I’m sure everyone does.

A lot of them are forgotten shopping lists or to-do lists. Boring, but it’s also weird to have tangible proof that I’ve done more than two things in my entire life.

One note is what I jotted down after my first tarot card reading. I was so nervous going into it. I was shaking as our tarot card reader led Ripley and me through the back of the store, past the parrot that imitates cat’s meows at customers, up creaky, paint-splattered stairs into an attic that was cluttered with what my memory is filling in as just dozens and dozens of candelabras, but I’m pretty sure that’s just wishful thinking.

But that shit was incredible. If you’re ever in the Boston area, go to Ritual Arts in Allston and get a reading. I think the woman’s name was Sarah? She was wearing all green and she had what I can only describe as a “jolly aura.” She definitely made me feel at ease as she translated what the universe had in store for me.

There’s also a list Caitlin and I made of “Things People Pretend are Good” which includes rain showers, cheese stuffed crust, and donuts. (Caitlin feels very passionately anti-donut. Personally, I do occasionally enjoy a cakey, artisanal donut but that wispy, floppy, tasteless shit from Dunkin’ Donuts? A joke and a scam!)

One of my favorites is a list I kept of things I overheard strangers say. It includes such hits as:

  • “I’m a PISCES.” “…I’m going to break your wrists.” [outside my apartment, 1 am]
  • “It’s like, do I hate this sandwich or do I hate my dad? I don’t know.” [college café]

A short but important list. Words I loved hearing British people say during my time studying abroad in Bath: everybody, strawberry, scrolling, collect.

Will anything be as satisfying as that crisp British T pronunciation?

This is a bulleted list of observations I made one night when we went to a club called Hong Kong in downtown Boston. It was surreal; it was like existing in the outer edges of multiple people’s dreams when they were on the cusp of waking. Maybe that’s a little too metaphoric for a place selling budget-friendly meat sticks on the dance floor?

What I saw:

  • Toy train tracks hung from the ceiling, no train in sight
  • Man carrying bucket of teriyaki chicken on skewers selling them for $1
  • TV playing karaoke using the Oregon Trail font
  • HUGE coconut with a face carved into it with a small typed label that said: “Mr. Kong”
  • Man in corner holding up whiteboard with his written commentary on the night, would continuously update (one update: “follow the meat stick”)
  • Small net full of maybe 10 balloons on ceiling
  • Glass case of arcade-style prizes with the number of tickets needed to win them. No specifications on how to win tickets

I think I only went to this club that one time. Not for lack of trying, though: I attempted to get in another night but my non-driver’s license state ID wasn’t sufficient for the bouncer. I never understand why people think I would get a fake non-driver’s license ID. For what end? So Billy at the movie theater can rudely ask me why I don’t drive yet when he cards me for a Rated R movie? It’s because I have anxiety, Billiam.

(I once told a bouncer this —half as a joke, half to make him uncomfortable because he was being rude— and he said, scrutinizing my clearly real ID for much longer than he had to, “You know anxiety is just fight or flight, right?” I’ve been cured ever since.)

***

This… is not what I had planned for this post. I was going to elaborate on some of my more serious notes and try to work through them in writing. Try to expand a half-thought into like, a 5/8th-thought, at least. Instead, I ended up with a frenzied list of other lists. Is this kind of the blog post equivalent to a compilation of vines?

I’m going to start ending my blog posts with a photo of my cats. Picture me unfurling a huge accordion pocket of cat photos from my wallet to show you, the clearly uninterested person sitting next to me at the DMV.  (Follow @shermamypond on Instagram to opt-in to my cat content.)

Here’s a picture of Amy the day after she got spayed. I was working from home and she was very sleepy and very cuddly and very much on drugs.

lOX-Obf4

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